JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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