did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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