Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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