No stitches, just platelets and will power
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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