rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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