Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
