did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
