you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
