I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
whose parrot is this?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
