I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
