so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
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