Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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