Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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