Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize