Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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