Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
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