I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
