also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
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