I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I will be naked everywhere
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
