By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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