i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Who did Billy Mays play for?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I checked into jail on foursquare
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
