I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I think i got beer on your cat.
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