do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
