I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
