No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize