my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
