I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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