I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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