She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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