I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
