I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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