Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
