I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
