She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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