Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
