We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
