boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
