I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
