Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
