Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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