Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Randomize
