Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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