Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
