he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize