I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
