What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
