you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
