Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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