I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
