How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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