from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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