do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
